TREY: Welcome! You know, we had to start with this song because this is the very town where IT all went down. This is the town where it all went down for your 31st birthday. [Trey plays “Happy Birthday”] Oh, and your mom is there too! It went down for your mom. Yes! I’m not sure if your mom knows the story of Harpua. I’ll tell it to her.
You know, this is the story about this dog. A very mangy, ugly dog, and he used to live in this area. He was always looking for trouble, and on this particular day that this story went down he was pawing his way around the docks looking for trouble. When out in front of him he saw a cat. And, yes, the cat was Jimmy’s cat. And, mom, the birthday girl, you may not know this, but that cat’s name was POSTER NUTBAG!
Anyway, making a long song short so we can get to next section, what happened was the two, the dog, the cat, came together, and they were about to be in a fight. They looked at each other. There was gonna be blood. There was gonna be anger. There was gonna be vitriol. And, as Poster Nutbag coiled his body into a deadly arch, as Harpua came crawling towards him, there was gonna be a fight. An angry drop of saliva dripped down onto the ground..
Look, the storms gone!
[Jimmy’s dialogue with his dad is played by Trey doing the Jimmy lines and the fathers of the band alternating turns playing the dad. Following “Your God damned cat died” the fathers then say the “How about a goldfish?” in unison.]
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