[There is a lot of banter before the start of the song in which Trey says this song is the story of a man named Jed, then the band teases Rocky Top. Trey can then be heard teaching the band the opening hand motions for Harpua before counting it in.]
TREY: You hear that barking? That can only mean one thing. Harpua, the meanest, nastiest dog in all of town. And this is of course the story of Harpua the meanest, ugliest dog around.
One day Harpua was moseying through the bad section of town, looking for a little action, looking for a little precious birthday fudge. Anyway, he walks along and he comes around a corner, and there in front of him around the other side of the corner is... a Big White Furry Creature From Town! Oh my God!
It’s a cat. Harpua is psyched, it’s gonna be a battle. And he looks up and suddenly a shock of recognition comes across his face. Because this is no ordinary Big White Furry Creature From Town…
Rock and roll, rock and roll! Woo!
This is the dreaded, the famous, the nasty, ugly, mean, ugly, horrible… it’s… it’s… it’s Poster Nutbag!
So the two of them look at each other and it looks like there’s gonna be a fight. It’s gonna be… people run and shutters are closing and people are going into their house as the two walk towards each other down the main street.
Poster coils his body into a deadly arch, ready to fight. And a hungry drop of saliva drips from Harpua’s mouth onto the ground as he grins ferociously! Grrrrrrrrr…
Look, the storm’s gone...
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